In a business damages trial a number of years ago, the plaintiff was answering questions with a lot of conditional phrases, like if, and but, and however.  At the conclusion of his cross-examination, the defendant’s attorney said the following:

If “ifs” and “buts” were candy and nuts, every day would be Christmas!

The judge immediately chastised the lawyer and told the jury to disregard the comment.  Which, of course, they didn’t, because they heard the testimony, as well.

Ifs and Buts

Bruce Turkel, a speaker friend of mine and a marketing guru, wrote a blog post the other day titled The Potential Danger of If and But.  He wrote:

Do you realize that if you add the words IF or BUT to an apology it demeans the sentiment and neuters the meaning?

“I’m sorry IF you thought I was being mean,” is not an apology because the IF has disclaimed the value of “I’m sorry.” Being sorry is not based on how the wronged party felt about the action being apologized for; it’s based on feeling remorse for having done something wrong in the first place.

“I’m sorry you were offended BUT I didn’t mean to hurt your feelings,” is not an apology because the intention of the slight has nothing to do with its ultimate effect.

And “I’m sorry IF you were bothered by what I said BUT I was angry,” is not an apology either because none of the conditions have anything to do with the situation being apologized for. Being angry enough to say something stupid is not a reasonable excuse for the stupidity itself.

He notes that from a marketing perspective, the use of disclaimers like IF and BUT can have a damaging impact on a company’s brand.  He goes on.

Did you know that 65% of the respondents in a well-crafted marketing study said they’ve stopped purchasing a product that was advertised with a message they found unacceptable?

Not only that but advertising was seen to have a significant impact on societal values. 47% of Canadian consumers interviewed said that advertising shapes public values vs. 40% who said advertising simply mirrors society. In the United States a majority of consumers said that advertising serves as a societal mirror but a large percentage still affirmed that unacceptable or disingenuous messages would make them change their mind about an upcoming purchase.

That’s pretty powerful stuff.  Thanks, Bruce!

Yes, But…

I have long said that when selling a business, you want to avoid questions where your answer is “Yes, but…”.  Chapter 17 of my book, Unlocking Private Company Wealth, is titled “Bad Things Happen to Good Companies.”  At the conclusion of the chapter, I wrote a short section on “Yes, but…”

You may be thinking that nothing like the above could happen to your company. Think some more. Bad things happen to good people and bad things happen to good companies.

When (or if ) that time comes for your business, you will want to have sufficient assets set aside so that you can live comfortably and inde- pendently of your business. Remember, when it is too late to diversify, it is too late.

A time of reversal in your business is not a good time to attempt to sell. Selling following adverse events or amidst adverse trends puts you in the position of what I call “Yes, but…” selling.

• Question: “Didn’t you just lose your largest customer?”
• Answer: “Yes, but you can find another…”

• Question: “So, your best salesman just left and took 20% of your business?”
• Answer: “Yes, but we’ll get those customers back and more…”

• Question: Your margins have been declining for the last three years?
• Answer: “Yes, but I’m sure you can turn them around…”You get the picture.  needs to be at left margin

If you find yourself in “yes, but…” situations when you are selling your products or services, it may be time to rethink some things.

I know that in the early years when Mercer Capital was new and much smaller, we were in that kind of situation when we competed directly for business with large accounting firms or national appraisal firms.  There was no question of qualifications or ability to deliver the work.  But buyers sometimes went with the larger firms because of what I call the “safety factor.”

They might say (or not):

YES, we’d like to hire you, BUT we have gone with the larger firm.

We might have been more qualified, able to deliver more quickly, and prepared to provide unbelievable service.  But in the back of the minds of some buyers was this little, nagging thought.

If something goes wrong and we hire the small firm, our bosses will wonder why we didn’t hire the national firm.  If something goes wrong with the larger firm’s service, then, well, we can say “What more could we have done?”

The solution for Mercer Capital, which took time, was to grow and to attain national, boutique status as an appraisal firm with several industry niches.

Wrap Up

The conditional use of IFS and BUTS damaged the testimony – and argument for damages – for the plaintiff I mentioned at the outset.

Bruce Turkel tells us that the use of conditionals like IFS and BUTS can be damaging to the marketing and branding of products and services.

I know from personal experience with clients who were selling businesses that being in a “yes, but…” position is difficult at best.  That’s why I always push the idea of getting businesses READY for sale.  Solve the “yes, but…” issues while you have time.

Question: Do you use conditionals in your conversations that diminish the impact of apologies?  I caught myself almost doing that last evening and managed not to do it.

Question: Are there aspects of your business, or what you are doing for a living, where you are in a “yes, but…” situation?  Now is a good time to get working on that thing or those things.

Until next time, be well!

Chris